what a day

I did not want to get out of bed today.....But I did.....I didn't do anything but lay on the couch until 3:00. I didn't feel like being Mom today at all. I'm glad that my friend Rhonda was here to help me with that. What am I going to do when she leaves and I have another one of these days. Who will I call? Let's see..... it could be any of you so beware!!!

After dragging my bootie off of the couch I took a bath and pulled myself together. I had a babysitter (3 of them) lined up for a girls night out so I had to get on it. We went out and had hibachi and then we went to Barnes and Noble to get coffee and look at some books. I got a real nice phone call that made things seem hopeful. We all had a few lighthearted conversations and some intense ones as well. It is so nice to have honest friends that look out for you.
Prov 17:17 A friend loves at all times...

Ya know...things seem bad in my life but they could be worse! Before you leave any one of worth to you remember to show them just how you feel about them because it might just be the very last time that you ever speak to them.

My elves

Well on the 12th day of Christmas my elves brought me a calendar for each month. They did not want known but we caught them. I opened up the door and there were 2 people standing there. I had no idea who they were. So I asked them who was doing this and they said that they couldn't say. I kept on asking them questions and then the car pulled up and it was my friend Susan. Her and some others were in on it. I was so wrong and I never would have guessed that it was them. I told them that we looked forward to it each and every day! I will have to pass on that blessing to someone else in the future.

pictures from Christmas day

My sisters dog Roxy opening up her gift. She was so funny she thought that she could open every one of them.

Mark sideways...sorry Mark you know how I am am with these computer things.
My sister with the willow tree that her son gave her.
Samuel with his new nascar jacket that my mother got for him.
Me opening up one of my many gifts that I received.
Here we all are on Christmas morning. Chandler is reading the Christmas story before we open any gifts. That is why we celebrate the Christmas season, Jesus birth.
Lanie with the digital camera that grandma got her. I have to remind myself that I need to buy batteries next year to go with the gifts. :)
Samuel with his MP4 player. He was so excited to get it even though he didn't even know what it really was.
Chandler opening his gift...It was his own digital camera.
Bennett and his bike. Now he doesn't have to ride on Lanies princess bike.

Christmas day

hey everyone.....I know that you all were worried about me on Christmas Day but to tell you the truth we had a wonderful day. The days that are not busy are the hard days.

On Christmas day we got up and read the Christmas story out of Luke chapter 2 then we opened all of our gifts. After that Aleecia and I cooked breakfast. We had pancakes, bacon and ham. We didn't eat until @ 11:00 so in essence we had brunch. After brunch we cleaned up the mess that the tornado made inside my house so that the company that was coming over could actually walk through my house. After getting all of that taken care of I cooked Christmas dinner. We didn't have the traditional...we had Italian(homemade Lasagna). Aleecia, Mark, Stephen, Kristen and Stephen and their kids came over and then someone I met from the base that had no family in town for the holidays cam over. We had so much fun after dinner, conversation, and when Mark got finished with the dishes we played foosball and Mad Gab. While I was getting the kids in bed the guys played pool. I thought alot about Aaron and how he would have loved it too!

Today my sister and her family went back to FL...I'm jealous I wanted to go to! The beach is calling my name. This morning I picked up my friend Rhonda that flew in from FL. She will be here through the 1st. We went to lunch and to church tonight. After the kids went to bed Brandy and I did Hip Hop Abs( like we need it) while Rhonda read in her book. I wasn't tired so we put a movie in. She went to bed and I have been on the computer talking with friends. I am getting sleepy now so I am going to call it a night. I will post Christmas pictures tomorrow.

May God bless you all.....Christina

cookies for santa!

Here are the kids with Stephen decorating the sugar cookies that I baked for santa. Every year when we were kids we would bake and decorate sugar cookies for Santa so we do this every year. I also like to make chocolate chip cookies in case santa gets tired of the sugar cookies.

Stephen and Samuel having fun decorating their cookies. If you look close you can see how particular that they were. They had to use tooth picks to decorate them with.Chandler and Bennett decorating their cookies. Bennett would put the icing on the cookie and then take his finger and lick it off. It was too cute.

Lanie and one of her many cookies with tons and tons of sprinkles on it. You can tell she is a girly girl, anything with a little sparkle and you have her hooked!
The finall product....Aunt Aleecia and I even decorated a few.
We left a glass of milk with a note for Santa.

pictures

Bennett and Lanie with Uncle Mark and Roxy




Lanie and her Aunt Aleecia( my sister)





The Kids and I before Church on Sunday mornig before Christmas




A picture of the 1st blanket that was made out of Aaron's military clothing and patches. This quilt is for Chamndler but I am not going to give it to him untill the rest are done(at least Samuel's) I am having one made for each of the kids and for myself so that we will always have him close to us wherever we go. There will be pocket in each one of them so that I can put a picture and a piece of clothing that smells like his colone in it. Thanks Leigh so much for doing these 2 quilts for me.

Christmas Eve

The night before Christmas and all through the house the McCoy kids were stirring they might have seen a mouse.

It seemed like the kids were restless all day today. This morning I tried to get them to help pick up and they did to an extent. Then we met my sister at Shorty smalls for lunch. We went home and I baked cookies or should I say I started baking them and my sister finished them while I watched the back of my eyelids for a while. I didn't even know my neighbor came by...I was even sleeping int he living room, that is how tired I have been. I am just unable to sleep at night. After the much needed cat nap Richard came over and brought us all gifts. The boxing gloves were a hit! Literally. They loved them. I think I might even get some use out of them. Then we decorated cookies(I had pictures of that but I downloaded them and now I can not locate them so I will have to look for them later)for Santa. All of my kids even my 10 year old still believes in Santa! He is questioning it now a little bit. After decorating cookies we went out light looking. They have the most beautiful set up on Sherwood at Woody's sherwood forest. Then we went to a house where it looked like Santa was actually inside the window eating cookies and setting out presents. It was the coolest thing!

Oh Lord, I praise you for what you have done in my life and will continue to do so. I know that you have a purpose for us and a plan, I have to lean on that so that I don't get down and depressed. Please Lord help us to enjoy the reason for Christmas. This is the time that we celebrate our dear Savior's birth. Let us also remember that we are to celebrate that fact each and everyday of our life. I know that Aaron is definitely with you right now and that comforts me, but I do miss him terribly. Please help me to continue to be that light that you would have me be to others while I am in this world. Thank you for allowing me the choice to enter into your kingdom for all eternity. In your precious name, Amen.

12 days of Christmas (11th day)

Tonight there were 11 $1.00 gift certificates for McDonalds. How thoughtful! I can't wait for them to come over tomorrow night and hand me my last gift. It has been fun trying to figure out who my elves are. I am definately going to have to do that to someone in the future!

12 days of Christmas(7th,8th 9th & 10th days)

7th day....7 godies to go with our movies

8th day....8 candy canes

9th day.....activites to keep the kids busy(crayons, colored pencils, books, 2coloring books, puzzle, activity book, and 2 things just for me to relax!

10th day.... 10 chololate covered santas

On the 9th day the elves almost got caught. My brother in law saw the car and a lady with brown hair and a pony-tail. I was in the discussion with my sister at the time so I couldn't see who it was. You all are good! Can't wait to know who the clever person/persons are. I was thinking and it might even be some of the people from the squadron. Whom ever you elves are it is nice to be looking forward to something each and everyday. Love you elves!!

time flies by when your having fun

Wow! It has been a couple of buzy days. I am going to have to catch everyone up.
On Wednesday My sister and her family go into town to be with me for the holidays. They cancelled their trip to his family in Tenn. becuase they didn't want me to be alone for the hoilidays. How selfless and givng is that. They are awesome. They have helped me around the house as well as to try and let me get some sleep, becuase I just can't seem to be doing that these days.

Thursday was a busy day for me. I had to take Samuel to the Dr.s to get x-rays on his wrist because the day before he had hurt it at school. It was just badly sprained. I took him back to school for his school party and stayed to help out his teacher. After they were dismissed for Christmas break I took Chandler in for surgery on his mouth. He had to have a skin graph done for the front 2 teeth. His gums were down past the root and to the bone of his jaw. They took skin from the roof of his mouth and placed it on his gums. He did very good. The dentist said that he did better than more adults do. He is not able to eat much and what he is eating has to be cut up like a baby would need. He is a real trooper. I have only had to give him medicine for the pain 2 times.

Friday......hummm can't remember friday much at all! sad to think I can't remember 3 days ago.

Saturday......Aleecia and I wrapped all of the Christmas gifts while the kids were gone with Richard and the 2 little ones were sleeping. When they woke we all went to the movies to see Alvin and the Chipmunks. The kids really enjoyed it. I saw only part of the movie because of Lanie and Bennett. Richard met us there with the older boys and helped with the 2 little ones. We tag teamed taking them in and out of the movie so not to distract others. Thanks Richard! My sister and I went out shopping to look for a few specific items that night and visited a friend at her work place. We came home and My sister and I had a discussion that was needed. Basicaly she reminded me that the kids need me and that I need to pull myself together. I'm not real sure why I have been acting the way I have lately except for the fact that I am missing things that I need like, words of encouragement, doing things with someone special, and even physical touch. Aaron always filled these things for me and now that he is not here I'm not gettng them as much or in a different way. I think that I have been closing myself off and making myself busy so that the emotions don't get to me. The talk was good and needed. I love you Aleecia.

Sunday......We went to church in the morning and then had a big lunch that I prepared the night before. Aleecia said that it was fantastic. We watched some football and relaxed a bit. Then we headed off to church for candellight service. We brought dinner home and got the kids in bed. Mark(my brother-in-law) put the bike together that I got Bennett for Christmas. He also hooked up my new scanner,copier, printer that I got. It is nice to have someone around who knows what they are doing with these things. After getting the kids in bed I went with a few friends to go bowling but they were closed by the time we got there so, we drove around most of the night and talked.

So basicly that is what has been happening here lately. Today will be another fun filled day with the McCoy bunch! Have a Blessed Christmas

flowers

Mother and Daddy, thanks you so much for sending me these flosers for Christmas. You two are the most thoughtful in-laws that I have. :) I love you both like you were my own parents!

Have a very Merry Christmas, Christina

Early Christmas

We received a package today in the mail from Aaron's sister, Leah and her family. I opened the box and there was a letter attached to open it early if we got it early, so we did just that. We ( My sister and I ) let the youngest go 1st. They did so well with waiting for each others turn. Bennett was 1st he got 4 puzzles in one.

Bennett with his puzzle box
Lanie went 2nd. She was so excited when she opened it up.
She just loves baby dolls. She is a true Mom at heart.
Chandler got to go 3rd and then we realized that his and Samuel's were the same so we let them open them together.

Here is Samuel opening his.
Me with a Willow Tree titled Hero
Here I am reading the letter (with tears in my eyes)to everyone about their own individual gifts.
The 5 of us.
As you can see they couldn't wait to play with their new toys!
Thank you Leah so much for all of your thoughtfulness in picking out us gifts. We sure do Love you all.

12 days of Christmas 6th and 7th day

On the 6th day of Christmas our elves brought us 6 sugar cookies. The funny thing about it was that my sister saw someone pull out of my neighbors driveway and she asked me to look to see if there was anything there. Lo and behold there was! That was our elves. Now we know for sure it is not my neighbors who is so clever and thoughtful enough to be doing this(You are still clever and thoughtful).
The 7th day brought us 7 treats to go along with our 3 movies from day 3. I can't wait to see what will be there for tomorrow. We are watching so beware to be found out!!

12 days of Christmas (5TH DAY)

I was curious to see if the elves are coming in the morning or evening to bring us our gifts. I checked at 12:30 and well it was there. It was 5 glass mugs with hot chocolate in them and the card read.....a little something to warm you up. These elves are so creative! I think I know who you are but I don't want to guess because if I am right it will ruin the surprise in the end for everyone. So for now I will keep my guesses to myself.

Christmas Program

Last night Samuel and Chandler had their Christmas program for the school. It was very well put together. The title of the story was "What does God want for Christmas?" After it was all said and done the little boy that got to open the presents from his friends realized that they were trying to tell him that all God wants for Christmas is you! He wants your heart. He wants you to know him and have a relationship with him so that you will be saved from an eternal life of Hell. They also went through the plan of salvation with the boy. All he had to do was admit that he was a sinner, believe that Jesus was sent here to earth to die for our sins, and then to ask him to forgive him of those sins and to come into his life so that he will live for all eternity in Heaven with him.

Both of the boys had speaking parts as well as singing with the whole class. Here is Samuel's class. They did a mix of NOEL. It was awesome. Great Harmony!! Aaron would have been so proud! Makes me tear up just thinking about how Aaron always wanted to sing with the boys as a ministry when they got older.

Samuel's close up. If you can call it that.

Chandler's close up

Chandler's class

All of K-5 through 6th grade I hope that you can see there pictures ok because my monitor is going out in my lap top and I am unable to see anything well. Maybe my elves will bring me a laptop for the 12th day of Christmas.

getaway pictures

Here are the pictures of the sun-setting along the coast of Fort Walton Beach. When I arrived there I had Rhonda take me straight there. It was awesome.

Here is a picture of me and the horse I rode. When we headed back from the trails it started raining on us. We made it back just in time before the thunderstorm started. Riding makes me want a horse of my own.

12 days of Christmas (4th day)

I had mentioned in a previous blog that someone was doing the 12 days of Christmas to us. Last night I opened the 2nd day and it was 2 boxes of dark chocolate covered cherries. The 3rd day had 3 free movie rentals in it. Well this morning on the front porch was the 4th day. There ere 4 Christmas ornaments with a bonus of some candy. I'm going to take my 1st guess that it is my neighbors Pam and Diane. The reason I think that it is them is because the packages are there early in the morning. Who else would get up and drive over to my house in the cold, and park far away so that we don't hear a car late at night or early in the morning. If it is or isn't you(Pam or Diane) I just want the "elves" to know that we have enjoyed you leaving us something each and every day!

Going home

I was able to sit down today with 2 of Aaron's co-workers/friends to help me with the pictures from the desert that I have of Aaron. I would have never known some of the things that they did while in combat. Now my kids will know them as well. The time that we all shared together today was amazing. We reminisced about Aaron. We cried some, or should I say I cried some, and we laughed too. I felt so honored that they would take their time and help me with this. I am forever grateful. Thank you!

I was torn today when I had to leave. I had such a nice time while there in Florida but, was ready to come home to my children. The 1st flight was wonderful. It was right at sunset. We took off and you could see the sun just peeking through the clouds, the bright red-orange glow was glistening off of the coast line. I sure thought the sunset was beautiful the other day from the beach but up in the sky watching it from the plane it was just breath-taking. I sat gazing out the window the whole time at the beauty that God created. I couldn't help but thinking that this was the view that Aaron saw day in and day out while flying there in Florida. Makes me want to fly more!

After arriving to Memphis I had a 2 hour layover. I grabbed some peppermint hot chocolate(it's the bomb) and watched some fox news. We boarded the plane and then it hit me, I was going back to the place where Aaron died, Arkansas. I cried the whole flight home. I sure am glad that no one was sitting next to me on this flight. I am at the point of being mad. Mad that we moved here, mad that Aaron is not here, mad that I have to do this by myself, mad that the kids will grow up not knowing their father, it's just not fair. I know that God doesn't promise us that life will be fair but, I just can't help to feel that way. It's just a stage of grief I know, and I thought that I wasn't going to go through it. But here it is looking me in the face. I think that is why I don't want to be here anymore. Then I just keep reminding myself of Jer 29:11.

magical

I spoke with the kids today all but Bennett. He is a little under the weather. The big boys went 4-wheeling today. Samuel said that he knows how to jump now. I asked him how he learned that and he said that when he hit a rock he just accelerated. I asked him if the thing had brakes and he said that he forgot about them. I was teasing him but he took me seriously. Oh well.

I spoke with Beth today and she said that there was a poinsettia left on the front porch yesterday for the 1st day of Christmas. Today she said that there were 2 packages on the porch and the note said something like this...... these 2 gifts are for the family to enjoy. They just seem to magically appear on the porch. I told her to watch for something tomorrow because there might be 3 of something there. Then it hit her someone is doing the 12 days of Christmas for me. Who could it be? Could it be our Sunday school class? I drilled Beth and she said no. Hummmmm who else could it be? Another Sunday school class form church, a neighbor or neighbors? Could it be a secret admirer? I couldn't be the same one who sent me the rose, could it? No, he is in Florida and the 12 days of Christmas is happening in Arkansas. This is going to be fun to figure out. I will figure it out. You better have some clever ideas up your sleeves who ever you are. I know, it's Kylan! He is the magician right?

This trip has been great for me. I have meet a lot of new people from all types of back grounds and ways of life. Yet one thing we all have in comon is that we are all on earth for a reason. We might not know that reason, but all things will work together for good for those who love God and who are called according to his purpose. Romas 8:28

relaxing

I know I haven't written in 2 days. Hummmm where do I begin? Friday morning I got up and went and got a pedicure done. That was so relaxing she even massaged my legs extra long. Then I was suppose to meet with Aaron's friend about the pictures that have with no stories behind them, but he called and said that he couldn't meet until probably Monday morning. That was fine, I had other stuff that I needed to do. I went with Rhonda to the mall then I met up with my Grandmother to go speak with a financial guy. He happened to be a friend from high school. After that we went shopping as well. After dropping her off at home I met my Dad at Old Bay Steemer. They have the best seafood in town. Aaron and I loved to go there. My Dad and I had a wonderful conversation about spiritual things and loved ones. Then I met my sister and her friend Amanda( now she is my friend too) to have a girls night out. We had so much fun people watching and laughing. It was another laugh as hard as you can until your cheeks hurt night. I even had a secret admirer send me a rose. Too bad that he never came up and talked to me. So it is still a mystery who sent it. Guess I'll never know!

I got up this morning and went with my friend Cheree horseback riding. It was very relaxing and therapeutic. We also had a nice conversation about Aaron and spiritual things. After that we went to have some lunch. While we were there, we went thorugh some of the pictures that I needed help with. She helped me with a great deal of them but, couldn't help me with the ones that Rozy needs to help me with. I had a quick moment to get on here before I go to dinner with Cheree, her husband and some of their friends. I hope that we will have a great time like we did last night.

I made it!

I have finally made it to Florida!!!! I left Little Rock this morning on a flight at 6:30 to Memphis. My connecting flight was to be at 9:30. During the 2 hour lay over I went to get come Starbucks ( I actually tried a peppermint white chocolate latte)and a bagel. After doing that I went to have relaxing wait at my departing gate. After watching the hundreds of people walk by they announced that my flight had been cancelled due to weather. Immediately my eyes swelled with tears as I laughed out loud. I said to myself......Ok what would I do if Aaron were here? Go and get rescheduled for another flight later in the day. I did just that. I was scheduled for a 2:30 flight to come in at 3:30. During the next 5 hours that i had to myself, I bought a book and started reading it, I talked to numerous friends, I did more people watching, and I even took a nap at the departing gate.
I prayed that this flight would not get canceled because the 1st thing that I wanted to do was to go to the beach. I did just that. I watched some surfers ride that waves and some skim borders( who I think were trying to show off) do flips in the air. Then as the sun began to set I walked toward the sunset watching every minute of it. It is absolutely breathtaking. The orange, red and yellow colors of the sun setting glistening off of the ocean as the waves crash next to the seashore. Aaron and I loved to go out to the beach to walk and talk. There were some seagulls along my path so I decided to run right into the middle of them to see how fast they would scatter, but that didn't happen. I believe that they were not afraid of me at all and just kept circling around overhead. It was so peaceful and relaxing out there. I might even go in the morning if time permits.
I have been up since 3:45 so I need to get some beauty sleep.
God Speed, Christina (Jer 29:11)

preperation

I decided this past weekend that I needed some time to myself, so I am taking a quick trip out of town. The kids are staying with dear friends of mine so that they don't miss school. I have been getting the house and things prepared for me to leave so that they don't have to much to worry about except for caring for my wonderful children.

Are you ever perpared to take a relaxing trip? There are so many mixed emotions about this trip for me. I don't want to leave my kids here but at the same time I really need to do this. I will be getting together with a few friends while there to go through all of Aaron's desert pictures from Iraq. I will be gathering stores for the kids so that they know what their Daddy did for their country. While there, I will also be relaxing on the beach and going horseback riding with Cheree. Aaron always tried to get me to go riding ( he knew that I loved it)but it never worked out for one reason or another. He would be so happy to know that I am going to be able to do that while I am there this time. I will try to remember to take pictures.

It's time to shove off and get a few more things done today so that this coming weekend I can relax knowing that there is nothing that was left undone.

God Speed,

Christina

Jer 29:11

mornings

Do you ever have those mornings where, well, you just can't seem to get yourself out of bed? I have been having them on a regular basis. But, I realize that I am all that these kids depend on, so I get up(with a smile on my face....wrong). Well, this morning was a little different. Bennett came in like he always does, when the rooster crows, to have me help him go potty. I usually end up laying back down but this morning was different. For the 1st it me in a long time I was ready to face the day( even though I went to bed around 2:00). The day went by amazingly fast considering I had not to terribly much to do...... Laundry, Christmas cards(they didn't get finished maybe tonight when I can't sleep) just to name a few things. I was on the phone quite a bit today, maybe that is why the time flew by so fast.

Lanie had dance tonight and John took her because Beth wanted to talk to me tonight about some things. Today had been a rough day for her and Brandy so we had a little session together. We had a great talk( whenever you can talk about the Lord openly with someone it is always great). There's not much else that I have to post today so I better go and get some of those things done that didn't get done today. God Bless you all!

Reminiscing

The McCoy bunch in March of 2007 at Petit Jean state park.

This is a picture of us on the "turtle rocks" while we were hiking on one of the trails.

In this picture Samuel and Chandler were having a blast running through the water fall

We hiked probably 2 miles to get to the water fall that the boys were playing at. Aaron is just caring him for fun here. On the way back Aaron had to carry him because his legs were tired and therefore he fell asleep.

Bennett and Mommy posing for a picture.

Lanie loves to take pictures and to have her picture made.

What a princess.

I was sitting in the living room a few minutes ago writing out Christmas cards when I had the urge to come to the computer and look at some photos of this past year. Wow, how much we did together as a family. One thing that we loved (ok I liked to do this) to go do is to go camping. We would try to go once a month. It didn't have to be far away just a get away from life hustles and bustles to enjoy what God had put together. We had so much fun setting up camp(if you can call it that with a camper), hiking, biking, playing at the playground(yes, we played too), napping, and cooking (roasting marshmellows and making smores was always everybodys favorites). The boys are sad that I had to sell the camper but as the weather gets warmer will will definatly be going camping(even if we do have to sleep outside with the bears).


I am looking forward to the springtime and summertime when we can just get up and go and do. We might not be home much this summer, but I do know that where ever we will adventure off to, we will be enjoying each other as a family that God has made.

Through the eyes of a child

Lanie woke up in the middle of the night last night in a panic. She was yelling that she wanted to talk with someone from church. I finally got her calmed down and we both fell asleep. The next morning when she came to snuggle with me I asked her if she remembered that she woke up last night. She immediately said, "I wanted to talk to so and so." I asked her what she wanted to say to him and she didn't answer. A few seconds later she said, "He looks like my Daddy". Then she went on to say "Can so and so be my Daddy?" I told her "no, he is married." I let this person know today what was going on and he talked to her and told her that he would be there for her whenever she needed but that he could not be her Daddy because she already had a Daddy."

Mystery solved

As I was going through a suitcase that not been put away since October, I came across the missing DVD that I was trying to locate. If any of you would like a copy please let me know and after the new year I will burn some copies.

emptiness

I just sit here staring and starting at this blank blog wondering what to write tonight. Like normal I am unable to sleep. I think I have felt every emotion that one person could possibly have in one day. Frustration, anger, sadness, loneliness, numbness, laughter, gratefulness, warmth, happiness, peace, joy....... I think that I have experienced all of them at some point today.


I spoke to a friend to day that Aaron called a dear friend. They remind me of Aaron in so many ways. Thank you for sharing some stories with me today. (you know who you are) It meant a great deal to me. I hope that we are able to share more stories with each other.



I loved being a wife to Aaron and that was stripped away, I absolutely loved every part of it.



I know that God has a purpose and a plan for my life (Jer 29:11) and that every thing happens for a reason but right now I just can't see it. Will I ever?



Will I ever be whole again?

No school

The kids had school off today for a teacher training day. They both got to stay up really late on Thursday night. They thought that was the coolest thing to stay up late. We went to the gym this morning and then went to the movies to see Underdog. It was a great movie. After the movie I took the boys into Game Stop... you would have thought we were in heaven. The boys were so excited to look around that store. After I picked up the little kids we came home and I started making the rest of the cookies for the cookie exchange tomorrow. Lanie helped me put all of the ingredients together for the cookies. While baking those cookies a couple from the military brought us 2 meals for the weekend. We had an awesome well rounded meal. Everyone from the church and the military are continuing to be such a help for us. Every little gesture is appreciated so much.

My friend Shannon sent me this devotion that she received form her husband's cousin and boy was it so fitting for all of us no matter what we are going through........


Evidence of Hope
For our light affliction, which is but for a moment, is working for us a far more exceeding and eternal weight of glory.2 Corinthians 4:17

Recommended Reading2 Corinthians 4:7-18
If you have ever had to practice football twice a day in 100 degree heat, endure nine weeks of military basic training, or live with nausea for six weeks of chemotherapy, you were likely told, "Hang in there. You can do anything for a short period of time." The difference between "temporary" and "permanent" can seem like the difference between life and death.
The apostle Paul knew the difference between the two. There were many occasions in his Christian life where he felt terrible, but he never lost heart (2 Corinthians 4:16). In fact, his favorite phrase was "but not": Hard-pressed, but not crushed; perplexed, but not despairing; persecuted, but not forsaken; struck down, but not destroyed (verses 8-9). Paul knew that every difficulty was temporary. Even if it lasted his whole life, he still saw it as temporary compared to the hope of eternity. If he ever lost hope, it was only for the moment. His permanent perspective was eternal hope in the goodness and purpose of God.
Have you learned to separate the temporary from the permanent in your life? That distinction is evidence that hope is alive and well.
The future is as bright as the promises of God.

The Lord knows exactly what we need when we need it. I really needed this to lift me up. Thanks for all of the encouragement.

recall

Shannon sent me an e-mail about a recall that Ford is doing on over 1 million vehicles and my vehicle is affected. That is why I think that I have been having so much trouble with my vehicle last month. While I was in Florida my step-dad had a sensor replaced for the problems that I was having. The recall is for a sensor on the engine that causes the vehicles to stall out and potentially cause accidents. I will be taking my vehicle in to make sure that the sensor that we changed out last month is the same sensor that they are recalling. It sure is nice to have friends and family that look out for each other. I love you all dearly!

rough week so far

Yesterday was 2 months since the last time that I was able to speak to my husband. It is hard not to think of it that way, but it will probably be like that for a long time. I did get lots of phone calls this week from people asking me how I have been doing. I guess that they probably realize the date coming up as well.
Those emotions are still flying like a roller coaster for us here. I was driving to the base commissary the other day and just lost it. I'm sure that the person driving next to me thought I was crazy. Oh well they don't know the pain and the loneliness unless they have walked in my shoes. The biggest thing that I have been dealing with lately is the fact that I can not just pick up the phone and call him whenever I please or the fact that he will never call me again. I just want to talk to him one more time.
Samuel is having a rough week as well. He lashes out in anger to his brother Chandler for little tiny things. He will be going tonight with our Youth minister to a magic thing so I am hoping that Kylan will be able to get him to open up.

missing dvd

I have been trying to locate the dvd from Aaron's memorial service that we had here in Arkansas at the church. If anyone has a copy please please respond to this entry. I really would like to have a copy and I can not seem to locate one. Thank you so much, Christina

Aches and Pains

I really didn't feel like getting on here tonight but I wanted to just jot a little something down. I woke up feeling great this morning, besides a few minor muscle aches from the work out last night, so I called my workout partner to go to the gym...and we did. After that we went by the store to pick up some milk. Later in the afternoon, John came over and helped me with hanging my lights, or should I say he hung the lights on the gutter and I put out the other ones. They look great if I do say so myself. I will take a picture and post it soon I hope. Beth took Lanie to dance and John grilled burgers for all of us. Brandy came over and had dinner with us as well. Sometime after hanging the lights I started to hurt again. This time it was my throat, ears, and my head. These symptoms had nothing to do with the other aches and pains that I have been experiencing. By now my head is throbbing every time I bend over. I know.....don't bend over. :) I have taken some sinus allergy medicine and some Motrin so I will be out here shortly. I sure hope that I don't get what Brandy got and that I feel better tomorrow because I am suppose to go out with April in the morning to get some erands done.

routine

Today has been a routine day for us.....Get up go to church, have lunch, take a nap(yes, all of us took a nap) and go back to church in the evening. Tonight my friend Kristen was baptized. That was very special to me because of the tragedy that has happened in our life there is another person that will be in heaven one day with our Lord Jesus.

I was doing some research for a friend of mine. She asked about having a daily devotional or what you can also call a quiet time. She had heard Aaron and I talking of it in the past and because she is a new christian she wanted to know. So, I have been on the computer looking up some daily devotionals for her via books and e-mail articles. Because she is a new christian she needs to start out with something that will encourage her and something that will help her grow int he word. While I was looking around I came across one that the Lord intended for me, and it could possibly help some of you. It is located at www.crosswalk.com/11560254/ It is not meant to get you down in any way but to lift you up and encourage you, like it did for me.

Friday night fun

I did end up going out last night with a few friends, Shannon and Brandy. We went out to dinner at New China, then we went to some upscale kitchen store called William Sanoma( I think that is the name). They had lots of fancy-shmancy stuff in there. For those of you who don't know about Little Rock .......West Little Rock is where the people go that have money and that is where this store is. NO Brandy, Shannon or myself don't have that kind of money but sometimes it is nice to go into those kind of places and act like you do. :) After spending time with the fancy-shmancy people there, we decided to go and check out what movies were playing. We decided to go and see a movie but it didn't start for another hour so we went to Starbucks to get some coffee. Not me, I don't drink that stuff, so I get the Strawberry cold stuff or for those of you who know what frappachinos are I usually get one of those, but last night it was to cold for that so I got the hot chocolate. After enjoying our drinks and each others company, we went to the movies to see Autumn Rush. If you haven't seen that movie it is worth going to see at the movie theatres. Coming from me that must be worth it because I cringe at spending money at the movie theatres. (right Mom?) After you go you will understand. We got home around 12:30 and talked with the babysitters for about an hour. Thanks so much Merdith and Katie for keeping the kids!! After they left, Shannon and Brandy and I stayed up till 3:30 talking, crying and lots of cheek hurting laughing. I don't think I have stayed up that long in years. Brandy stayed over and we went to sleep around 4:00.

The kids got is up bright and early at 6:30 so after 2 and a half hours of sleep the only thing I could watch was the back of my eyelids, so Brandy (that spring chicken) took the 2 little kids with her to her house and let me sleep until I wanted to. The older boys came in a couple of times to ask questions but I was able to get some sleep inbetween the interuptions. I finally felt refreshed after I got up at 12:30. The last itme I slept that late was when Aaron and I took the weekend and went to Branson by ourselves for our anniversary. Thanks April for keeping them that weekend!! The kids came home and ate lunch took naps and then we went to a birthday party at the community center pool. Boy, how my kids love to swim! We came home had dinner and got ready for bed. Once the kids were in bed Brandy and I watched a movie here at the house. Or should I say I watched the movie while Brandy watched the back of her eyelids this time.

I realize that we all (the men included) need friends every day......weather it is for chatting, doing favors for us, helping us through the good... and bad times, to tell us if we look good..... or bad, to watch our kids, to give us advice, to encourage us, to make us a meal or 2, to check the house while were away, to keep our pets, to call for no reason at all, and to pray for each other. I guess to sum it all up to be a friend means to be a blessing to someone you care about. Don't forget to tell them that too!